Studying abroad has always been a goal for me. Now that it is finally happening for me it feels unreal. Before arriving, I admit I had very high expectations. I tried to plan out the trip in my own strength expecting everything to be perfect. God gave me a huge reality check!
All my fears began to surface about a month into the trip. I felt anxious about everything. It was hard for me to live in the moment and not worry about the future. I felt a little disappointed because the trip wasn’t looking like what I wanted it to be. I also began to feel something that I couldn’t quite pinpoint. It was an emotion that felt heavy. I didn’t know what to think or feel in the midst of everything.
But God is showing me that he is trying to teach me something through this trip. I am learning to be more positive and not to focus so much on what I want. God is teaching me to be more sacrificial and how not to focus on the future as much. He is also dealing with my emotions. He is teaching me to shake off foolish feelings. He is teaching me to be quick to forgive and forget. The Lord is also teaching me a great deal about patience. I know that the Lord has been incredibly patient with me and I need to do the same with others. God has also given me a greater desire to love on this trip. All I want is to be a better reflection of Christ.
I know that God wants me to enjoy this trip. He wants me to admire all the beautiful places he has created. He also wants me to laugh and enjoy life. I am learning to not hold on to my will so tightly, but instead let go and let God move in the ways that he wants to.