Reality

Ok, I am certain many people do not glamourize a trip to Africa. I am not sure many people think about going to Africa! But we have all glamourized something - made it to be more romanitc, so to speak, than it is or will be. It is the desire to go or do something, we, or I, build it up in my mind until no circumstance could live up to the actual thing.
I probably did this a little leading up to this trip, actually more so maybe 6 months ago when it was a discussion. The last month has been wild with Christmas and a kid home from college and a new-ish job. And danged Covid to worry about interrupting our plans.
Today was a reminder (again) of the reality of being in a developing nation. I thought I was free and clear (in the sweating department) with a vehicular tour of the countryside and Firestone factory. But today, something on the truck were making a horrible noise. We stopped at

one friend's house for a quick diagnosis. The left front brake. We keep going (I am not totally clear on the plan at this point). We finally pull over at an auto mechanic shop, Liberian style. An empty shipping container transformed and a makeshift canopy. We are taken care of right away, but Hawa and I sit on the porch of a home/store for I am not sure how long. Then we continue on our journey. The noise is as loud as before. I finally say "please do not continue on if it is only for my sake." We turn around and the noise stops. So we decide that is a sign to abandon the trip.
I spent an hour with kindergarteners then. When I say kindergarteners, I mean ages probably 2-7. I have no idea of what they are learning or understanding. The 6-7 year olds seemed not all amused with me. The littles had no idea what was going on but smiled at me anyway. I think a couple of kids were asleep. It was a long hour and sweat was actually dripping off my nose while trying to avoid standing on the ant hill. I am learning to ignore the sweat...or at least soldier on. I had to laugh to myself when I was rescued...er...it was time to go home...if ever I thought a trip to Africa is glamourous, I was reminded today it is not.
I often think of something my friend Jan said to me once and it came to me today. When I wanted to lead a mission trip to Uganda but didn't want to take that spot someone else might want, she said, "Nobody else wants it." Ohhhh. I am not telling this story because it makes me special, I tell it because she invited me to look at my heart's longing in a different way. I am not romanticizing it (well maybe a little til I start sweating), It is a heart's dsire. We all have unique desires of the heart - God gives us those. What sounds so fabulous you wonder why you aren't doing it? Do that.